Wednesday, June 25, 2008

25 years ago today.....

I was a blushing bride. Well, on second thought I don't think I was really blushing. I was pretty over confident and maybe a bit cocky as young girl's in love often are :).
I really do admire my parent's subdued reaction to the whole affair. I can't imagine having similar restraint if my 18 yo daughter ( actually I was 17 when we got engaged) came to me with this news. My dad gently tried to discuss waiting with me, but I was having none of it. They then very kindly and lovingly supported us and financed a beautiful wedding. I guess they had the wisdom to know that even though you are quite young at 18, you still must make and live with your own decisions.
I applaud them for it.
Of course, an 18 yo marrying a 21 yo could have ended in complete disaster and often does.
God has graciously allowed us 25 years together.
Of course, like any other marriage it has had it's ups and downs. Some of the sandpapery type moments have felt more like an industrial sander grinding off huge chunks of wood and throwing them through the air. On the other hand, and I said this to Tim once not long ago, I proclaim without hesitation that even if everything was a horrible mess in my life from here on out, I could still say I have lived a charmed life because of my years with him.
That's not say we don't have lots more to learn or things to work on. We are both prickly people and we prickle at each other. A lot sometimes. On one hand that is not a good thing for any relationship nor is it good for people who have to live some of that relationship with you. On the other, maybe it is a testament to the fact that we both feel so comfortable around each other....we just let our hair down in whatever form it comes in.
That is the gift my husband gives me. The ability to just be me. I almost can't imagine anything I could say or do that would make him give up on his commitment to me and our family. I know that there are things I say and do right now that give him a run for his money, yet he always keeps trying and keeps standing firm.
Besides God, he is the rock we all jump on when the waters get rough and high around here,
the glue that keeps our family together when emotions cloud our minds or outside influences blurry our vision.
I am a blessed and grateful woman.
Cheers! Here's to 25 more!


Tim said...

This is long, so I apologize in advance for the stream of consciousness...but I have to just hammer this out sans much redaction due to work pressures:

My wife's many talents:

1. Beautiful
2. Clean hearted & strives for Godliness
3. A brilliant intellect
4. Reads stacks and stacks of books on every subject imaginable
5. Top-notch on crafts and home arts
6. A skilled floral designer and interior decorator, not to mention a gourmet cook/chef (this is not hyperbole - Fruits de Mer/Seafood Newburg, Roast Lamb with Mustard/Rosemary Sauce, Vegetable Medley in White Wine Sauce, Coq au Vin, Italian, Polish, Romanian, Thai, Indian, Middle East and Mexican dishes galore - it's Babette's Feast every day at our house!) - all of these gifts celebrated by our family and friends
7. Thrifty, thrifty, thrifty - she feeds us the aforementioned meals, clothes our children beatifully and furnishes our home on a *shoestring* budget - although God has given me a good job, I committed the lion's share of our income to a large house for the 12 of us - but she makes the most of the leftovers, which often are not much (but enough by God's grace and provision). Proverbs 31
8. Responsible, level-headed and strong
9. A skilled teacher of our children
10. Mind-melds with me on a very large number of matters - still amazes me to this day. In some ways it's hard to be objective about her qualities because we meld so; I heard a very wise and holy teacher once describe one of the intended consequences of the "they shall be one flesh" concept first put forth by God in Genesis 2:24. He said that in the same way that one is often blind to one's own faults, one should apply this to one's marriage and be "blind" to the faults of one's spouse. Yes, this can be hard, if forced; but he said that one will it a natural result of thinking correctly about God's design for the marriage union - she is, in a manner of speaking, "me", and I, "her." Now, the point of this teaching was overlooking failings, yet it affirms the great blessing Kris and I have received in the "meld"...from the day we met in our late teens, we could complete each other's sentences, and it's still true today - so I'm probably overlooking, even now, some of her qualities! But I think that's the way Good Lord intended it to be.

Tim said...

"...still Rockin' the Casbah after 25 years!!!" :) Love ya sweetie. TV

Tim said...

And I promise not to tell anyone about your Duran Duran albums and your crush on Simon LeBon back in '82... :)

Here's a good one from 1981 (the year after we met, 27 years ago)...Kris and her best friend Margaret, who were both 16, tried to get me (I was 19) to get them into Harpo's bar (drinking age then was 18) to see "a new band". I rolled my eyes and sighed and asked which "punk" band they were into now...she said it's this new group called "U2". I said, "I'm not going to risk getting into trouble just to get you two in to see some obscure new-wave band nobody's ever even heard of". Yeah, they probably never amounted to anything.... :)

Lisa C. Vrazo said...

this was so cool to read.
ben and i are working toward that and its encouraging that its been done. so we know its possible :)

Tim said...

oh yeah - I forgot "Fashionista" :)

Kris said...

oh yeah - I forgot "Fashionista" :)

--what the heck???????? ;)

abivrazo said...

So. Uncle Tim.
I'm working on my hatred for you. And the fact I can't claim my uncle saw U2's birth. If I don't talk to you this week, that's why.



Aunt Kris,
you are my hero.

Streams of consciousness from a mother of 10 who usually can't collect her thoughts and finds commas a nuisance.